I have a confession to make: I have a dirty little secret. I’m embarrassed to talk about it but doing so is an important part of my recovery process. My dirty little secret is that I’m not only a dyed in the wool perfectionist, but I’m also my own worst critic and task master.
There, I said it. (Whew…that wasn’t so bad!)
I’ve always had unreasonable expectations of myself. I should be able to juggle a crushing number of tasks and commitments (for myself and for others), complete them all flawlessly and expeditiously, do them without breaking a sweat and with a smile on my face, and not complain about any of it.
Sound like a formula for disaster? It is.
This combination of traits is a nasty cocktail that has caused me more stress, burnout, and struggle than I care to admit. It’s also done more to undermine my progress as an entrepreneur than any other challenges that I’ve faced.
It’s a double-edged sword. The trick is to not fall on the sword.
It's important to acknowledge and accept our own foibles and "weaknesses", and then manage and leverage them so that they work for us rather than against us.
We need to give ourselves permission to be human.There is a little voice inside of us that not only seeks approval from others, but it also seeks approval from ourselves. When I finally realized and understood this, I began to get out of my own way.
Giving yourself permission to be human means:
- Acknowledging and embracing your perceived imperfections and weaknesses. They are what make you unique and interesting. More importantly though, they challenge you to improve and grow, and as also clues to finding your strengths.
- Acknowledging and embracing your vulnerabilities. Our vulnerabilities teach us to have compassion and empathy…for others as well as for ourselves.
- Acknowledging and embracing your mistakes. Mistakes are a powerful learning process. They teach us about what works and what doesn’t. They will also teach you a lot about ourselves.
Give yourself permission to be you…in all your complex and multifaceted glory. Give yourself permission to “suck” and screw up from time to time. Learn from it. Grow and evolve. It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth the effort.I’m curious...do you find yourself getting stuck because of perfectionism or being too self-critical? How has it affected your life? How do you deal with it?
source of blog by Nadia Koligman